A Quiver Full

Some of you may have noticed a new graphic and blogroll in my sidebar. I was invited by Kristine to join the Quiverful Blogroll. Below you will find our quiverful story.

The road to my quiverful conviction was one that started when I was just a young girl. When I was about 10, 11, 12 years old my sister, brother, and I started asking my parents if we could have another sibling. For awhile my mom gave us a very vague answer as to why that wasn’t likely to happen. After a few years of being asked this question my mom finally told us why she couldn’t have any more children. After my brother was born, she had had a tubal ligation. I was not quite 3 years old when he was born and my sister was about 21 months old. My mom was overwhelmed and did what society said was the right and normal thing for a mother of 3 children to do. I was about 14 years old when my aunt and uncle and their children came to visit us in WV. While they were there my uncle told my mom and dad about the reversal surgery he had had recently. My mom and dad were intrigued and asked more about how people went about getting a reversal. Sometime not too long after they left my parents received the funds anonymously to have reversal surgery! Everything was paid for! The surgery! The plane tickets! Everything! We were ecstatic! We were sure that within months after the surgery God would bless our family with more siblings. God’s plan was different. My mom is now almost 54 years old and has never had another child. God showed me then, as a young teenage girl, that He was in control of everything, even a woman’s womb. It was at that point that I committed myself to having as many children as the Lord would choose to bless me with someday.

During our engagement, Scott & I, joked about having 15 children but in our hearts we were very willing to have many children. We got married in June of 2000. Six days after our wedding we flew to Alaska to live for an undetermined amount of time. When we left we had no vehicle or job lined up. We had talked with a man my husband had met the summer before when he and two of his friends had spent a month wandering in the bush of wild Alaska. Within hours of landing in Anchorage we bought an older truck and headed to Glennallen about 3 hours NE of the city. Within a few short weeks Scott had a job at the local grocery store in the deli. It was going to be several months before our health insurance would kick in. At Scott’s request we used non-chemical birth control for the first 9 months of our marriage. I knew that if God wanted to give us a child He could do it inspite of our use of birth control. It was my desire to not use any form of bc but it was a very foreign concept to Scott. He wanted lots of children but thought it was normal and right to “control” when our children would be born. It was 7 months after he agreed to start “trying” for a baby that we conceived our first child. It was during this pregnancy that my husband also became convicted about the use birth control. He realized that God didn’t need our help in planning or avoiding pregnancies. When our oldest son, John, was 10 months old, I conceived again! I was schocked and elated! After our second child, Noah, was born I falsely assumed that I would get pregnant again quickly. After Noah turned one I started to wonder if I’d ever have another precious little one. When Noah was 18 months old I did conceive again but had a very early miscarriage. It was another 4 months before I conceived our youngest child, Isaiah. He is now 14.5 months old and we are still waiting for the Lord to bless us again.

I’m so thankful for what the Lord taught me through watching my parents correct a mistake they had made. I’m also thankful that the Lord convicted my husband of leaving fertility in His capable hands. I must admit that at times I think God is taking a little too long to give me what I desire but I know beyond the shadow of a doubt that His plan is perfect and I rest in that fact.

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8 thoughts on “A Quiver Full

  1. Thank you for your story, I hope it wasn’t because of a bit of our conversation at church. Bob strongly suggested I get my tubes tied after the birth of our newest, but I refuse. Personally, I don’t know that God would have any more in His plans for us seeing as I will be married for 6 yrs and will have given birth to 2, and now I am in my 30’s. I understand your point and rejoice in your belief, but I also know that 2 must be like-minded in their journey together. Also, I believe that although God doesn’t give us more than we can handle, in our situation in particular, I want to be able to feel as though I can spend quality time with my children without being constantly overwhelmed. I do not do well, and have a great lack of patience, in highly active situations and get stressed easily. I want to be a good mother to my children, able to care for their every need physical, emotional, spiritual, etc… All of these words are directed specifically at my situation, no one else. Yes, it would seem that I am using reasoning for our decision that this one be our last but honestly, I feel as though at this point in time I am struggling with many different circles of belief, and I don’t feel as though my circle is fitting well anywhere. You see, society looks at me in disdain, as you can read their thoughts when we go out “man, don’t they know what birth control is?” when people see my crew of 4 and find out I am expecting. Then in Christian circles, I feel it is difficult to say that “our family feels like this little one will be our last” are shunning words too because I am limiting God and His Plan, ESPECIALLY after desiring children so desperately and so much. So, my apologies Leah, that your post hit a tender nerve for me, It is a beautiful post telling your story but I just felt like maybe part of it was written because you heard me tell my mom “I think we are done after this baby”, and I have been a bit overwhelmed with all of the “critism” that has been flying around me as of late. Even when we told Bob’s mother we were expecting, she gave me this look like I was from another planet- How Dare I allow myself to be with Child! I truly hope I haven’t offended you, this was actually a good thing for me- to get some of this off my chest since I have been holding it inside and hardly sharing it with anyone…Thank You…

  2. You’re a dear friend, Elizabeth! I hope that you will remember that I’d never do or say anything to purposefully offend you! Friends don’t treat each other that way!

    I’m not offended by what you said. And I hope that you aren’t offended with me either. I wrote this post because the lady who is hosting the blogroll left a comment and an email asking me where the post was. Part of the “deal” with joining the blogroll was to make a post about our quiverful convictions. I joined well before Christmas and still hadn’t made my post. I wrote it for that reason and that reason alone.

    I did hear you say that you didn’t think you’d be having more than the 5 children you have now. It wasn’t my place to ask for clarification. And not only that but the decisions you and your husband make are between you and the Lord. You don’t need to defend yourself to me or anyone else.

  3. Leah- Thank you so much for your testimony! It is wonderful how the Lord worked in your life concerning this issue by using your parents and their journey. It has and I am sure will continue to be a blessing to me to know you and to be able to share and discuss our beliefs!
    Kristine

  4. Hi Leah,
    I liked reading your post…and am always waiting to hear the great news! I know what Elizabeth means about people looking your way in disgust…Ive had my fair share of that. People have gone so far as to ask us if we are aware how this happens? It can really hurt your feelings. I had a friend comment how sweet Eli was and I said..thats why I keep having them…and she said aren’t you worried about college? Of course I said they will have to get good grades, scholarships, and I was embarassed and thought that perhaps I really was being so greedy to have all of these kids when my husband is not a doctor or a lawyer or something…so I asked Cory about it…and he just said they do not see children as blessings but as burdens, and they dont live in the same “world” we do and therefore will just not understand. Another incident that really hurt was a friend of mine gave me a shower when Eli was due (not the church) but found out later that she had told someone that “I had better not have anymore children…due to money reasons, and whatever else…I was so hurt to think that someone was celebrating with me when perhaps they thought that Eli shouldnt even have been. While it is sometimes a struggle for me to see others distaste in their eyes and words…I have great pride in my family, and the fact that God would bless me soooo greatly just brings me to my knees. Sorry this turned into my little therapy session, but I really related with Elizabeths comments, and feel her pain….and also her joy!

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